A night to honor Israel is an expression of Christian solidarity with the state of Israel and the Jewish people.
The Bible commands us to pray for the peace of Jerusalem (Psalm 122:6) to speak out for Zion's sake (Isaiah 62:1) to be watchman on the walls of Jerusalem (Isaiah 62:6) and to bless the Jewish people (Genesis 12:3). These and many other Bible verses have one overriding message --as Christians, we have a Biblical obligation to defend Israel and the Jewish people in their time of need.
Israel's time of need is now. There is a new Hitler in the Middle East, President Ahmadinejad of Iran, who has threatened to wipe out Israel and America and is rapidly acquiring nuclear technology to make good on his threat. If we learned anything from the Holocaust, it is when a madman threatens genocide we must take him seriously.
During the Holocaust too many Christians were silent and we were left to mourn the slaughter of 6 million Jews. Today, Bible believing Christians must speak up and stand for Israel. We must act to do whatever we can to protect Israel's 6 million Jews from the second Holocaust.
We must get it right this time. Our faith demands it. The times requires it. Silence is not an option. We will be silent no longer.
We pray that you will attend a night to Honor Israel to stand up and speak up for the State of Israel and the Jewish people.
Go to this website to see a list of dates and communities celebrating a night to honor Israel:
http://www.cufi.org/site/PageServer?pagename=events_calendar
(above message copied from the website)
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Sunday, August 22, 2010
True Fatherhood
If you've ever wondered how much of an impact a father can have on his children, let me share with you the true story of how Father's Day began.
It had a sad beginning when, in 1898, Willam Jackson Smart, the father of six children, sat grieving with his head in his hands. His beloved wife, Ellen, had died several days earlier, and now about him clung his weeping children. The winds outside threw great scarves of powdered snow against the window panes, when suddenly one of his youngest sons tore himself from the group and rushed out into the storm calling for his mother. Yet even his baby voice could not penetrate the great silence that held his mother. Hurriedly his father gathered him into his arms and back to the protection of their home. In the following years, Willaim Jackson Smart, alone, kept paternal vigilance over his motherless children.
Many years later William's only daughter, Sonora, was living in Spokane Washington. She often spoke of what an honor it was to have him as a father and petitioned the local leaders to set aside a day in June (the month her father was born) to celebrated Father's Day. The years did nothing to dimish Sonora's great love, respect, and honor for the man who raised her and her brothers.
Likewise, the scriptures tell of a man named Helaman, who was the leader of 2,000 stripling warriors. These warriors had a great deal of love, respect, and honor for him. The verses in Alma chapter 56 are often used to illustrate the great influence of mothers in the lives of the young warriors, and although that is true, they also contain a touching example of true fatherhood. Helaman was not their biological father, but he was a great surrogate father for the Ammonite warriors. The young men agree to go into battle if Helaman would lead them. In a letter to Moroni, Helaman told of a discussion he had with the young men before their first battle. He said: "For as I had ever called them my sons (for they were all of them very young) even so they said unto me: Father, behold our God is with us, and He will not suffer that we should fall. And they did think more upon the liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives."
The world is full of many modern day Helamans who as stepfathers, grandfathers, uncles, scoutmasters, bishops, home teachers, neighbors, and youth leaders, reach out and bless the lives of those in need of a father. By their example, children learn to recognize true fatherhood.
True fatherhood leaves an indelible imprint upon the lives of children. In 1 Nephi chapter 16, Lehi's son, Nephi, went out to hunt for food and ended up breaking his bow. His brothers were very angry with him and when they returned to their families without any food, nearly everyone including Lehi began to murmur because of their sufferings and afflictions in the wilderness. They even murmured against the Lord. The only one who did not murmur was Nephi. Instead he chose to work hard and make another bow and arrow. Then he straightway went to his father and asked, "Whither shall I go to obtain food?" Although Lehi showed weakness when he previously murmured, he nearly always provided a steadfast example of righteousness for his family. It was only natural, then, that Nephi came to him and in essence asked, "Will you go and ask God?" This provided a gentle reminder to Lehi of his special place as patriarch of his family. He did ask God, repented for his murmuring, and God told him where food could be found.
Scientific studies have shown that a father's relationship with his children affects both sons and daughters, however it is most critical with the daughters as it directly affects her relationship with all other males in her life.
In fact, it's been said that a husband pays the price or reaps the reward sown by his father-in-law. A positive example involves Atlanta quarterback Chris Chandler. When Chris met Diane Brodie, the woman who became his wife - daughter of legendary San Francisco 49ers quarterback John Brodie - he had played on three teams in five years and his football future looked bleak. Just a few years later, Chris threw 3, 154 yards in one season, including 25 touchdown passes leading the Atlanta Falcans to a 14-2 regular season and on to the Super Bowl. When asked about his spectacular comeback, he told USA Today about his wife, Diane, and her father, John. He said they had a great relationship. John was loving and supportive while Diane was growing up, helping her develop a healthy dose of confidence and self esteem. She, in turn, did the same for her husband. By loving and supporting his efforts to improve, Diane helped Chris to become more confident and successful.
Howard W. Hunter said, "One of the greatest things a father can do for his children is to love their mother."
Fathers, if you want to help your children find happiness in marriage, give them a good example to follow. Take a moment to look at your young sons. Your treatment of their mother is teaching them how to treat the girls and women in their life, and eventually their wife. Now look at your young daughters. Do you want them to marry a man who treats them the way you treat their mother? If you are loving and supportive and affectionate with their mother, those are the characteristics your daughters will likely be drawn to when looking for a husband. If you are critical of your wife and too busy to give her the love and support she needs, that is what your daughters will grow up thinking is a normal, natural relationship between a husband and a wife and may very well choose the same kind of husband. And every bit as important as loving their mother, your daughters need to know you love them. Your love and support of her will give her the confidence she needs to choose a husband that also makes her feel loved and supported. Absent or distant fathers, or fathers who are critical and withhold loveing support from their daughters will likely have daughters who choose husbands just like their father. Why would they do that? Because deep inside these wounded daughters of God, they want to win their daddy's love. Without being aware of what they are doing, they keep putting themselves into relationships where they fight the same battle as they try to win the love of yet another distant and critical man. This often spills over into their perception of their Heavenly Father. If a woman grew up believing her father didn't love her and was critical of her, she may find it hard to believe that she is worthy of her Heavenly Father's love, and that His love is unconditional.
Fathers, when you understand the impact you have on your children, it might seem a bit overwhelming, but Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, provide you with a clear example of true fatherhood to follow. A father who emulates Their example will give each of his children the same unconditional love, sincere care and concern that Heavenly Father gives to him, not only when the children are young for lifelong; not only when the children are obedient, but even when they are disobedient, especially when they are disobedient. Unlike Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, you won't be perfect; you will make mistakes. But by daily communicating with Heavenly Father through prayer you will be guided in the right direction and begin to more fully understand what it means to be a true father.
In the Old Testament, King David showed true fatherhood in his unconditional love, care and concern for his son, Absolom. Absolom was David's third son and was described as the most handsome man in the kingdom. He wanted to be king and waged a rebellion in which he gained many followers. And even though he warred against his father, David told him men to deal gently with Absolom. One of his men, Joab, disobeyed and killed him. Upon hearing the news of his death, David grieved for his son. 2 Samuel 18:33 reads, "...the king was much moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept: and as he went, thus he said, O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God that I had died for thee, O Absalom, my son, my son!"
The exalted position of father was well stated by General Douglas MacArthur who said, "
By profession I am a soldier and take pride in that fact. But I'm prouder - infinitely prouder - to be a father. A soldier destroys in order to build; the (true) father only builds, never destroys. The one has the potential of death; the other embodies creation and life. And while the hordes of death are mighty, the battalions of life are mightier still. It is my hope that my (child), when I am gone, will remember me not from the battle but in the home repeating our simple daily prayer: Our Father who art in Heaven...."
May Heavenly Father richly bless you who are currently or will someday be fathers, or like Helaman, are surrogate fathers. May He bless you with wisdom, judgment, understanding, faith, kindness, and love. And may He bless the children in your life that your hand may strengthen and guide them safely home again. May those around you gain a deeper understanding of Heavenly Father because of your example of true fatherhood.
(Portions of this document are taken directly from the book, "What a Difference a Daddy Makes" by Dr. Kevin Leman.
It had a sad beginning when, in 1898, Willam Jackson Smart, the father of six children, sat grieving with his head in his hands. His beloved wife, Ellen, had died several days earlier, and now about him clung his weeping children. The winds outside threw great scarves of powdered snow against the window panes, when suddenly one of his youngest sons tore himself from the group and rushed out into the storm calling for his mother. Yet even his baby voice could not penetrate the great silence that held his mother. Hurriedly his father gathered him into his arms and back to the protection of their home. In the following years, Willaim Jackson Smart, alone, kept paternal vigilance over his motherless children.
Many years later William's only daughter, Sonora, was living in Spokane Washington. She often spoke of what an honor it was to have him as a father and petitioned the local leaders to set aside a day in June (the month her father was born) to celebrated Father's Day. The years did nothing to dimish Sonora's great love, respect, and honor for the man who raised her and her brothers.
Likewise, the scriptures tell of a man named Helaman, who was the leader of 2,000 stripling warriors. These warriors had a great deal of love, respect, and honor for him. The verses in Alma chapter 56 are often used to illustrate the great influence of mothers in the lives of the young warriors, and although that is true, they also contain a touching example of true fatherhood. Helaman was not their biological father, but he was a great surrogate father for the Ammonite warriors. The young men agree to go into battle if Helaman would lead them. In a letter to Moroni, Helaman told of a discussion he had with the young men before their first battle. He said: "For as I had ever called them my sons (for they were all of them very young) even so they said unto me: Father, behold our God is with us, and He will not suffer that we should fall. And they did think more upon the liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives."
The world is full of many modern day Helamans who as stepfathers, grandfathers, uncles, scoutmasters, bishops, home teachers, neighbors, and youth leaders, reach out and bless the lives of those in need of a father. By their example, children learn to recognize true fatherhood.
True fatherhood leaves an indelible imprint upon the lives of children. In 1 Nephi chapter 16, Lehi's son, Nephi, went out to hunt for food and ended up breaking his bow. His brothers were very angry with him and when they returned to their families without any food, nearly everyone including Lehi began to murmur because of their sufferings and afflictions in the wilderness. They even murmured against the Lord. The only one who did not murmur was Nephi. Instead he chose to work hard and make another bow and arrow. Then he straightway went to his father and asked, "Whither shall I go to obtain food?" Although Lehi showed weakness when he previously murmured, he nearly always provided a steadfast example of righteousness for his family. It was only natural, then, that Nephi came to him and in essence asked, "Will you go and ask God?" This provided a gentle reminder to Lehi of his special place as patriarch of his family. He did ask God, repented for his murmuring, and God told him where food could be found.
Scientific studies have shown that a father's relationship with his children affects both sons and daughters, however it is most critical with the daughters as it directly affects her relationship with all other males in her life.
In fact, it's been said that a husband pays the price or reaps the reward sown by his father-in-law. A positive example involves Atlanta quarterback Chris Chandler. When Chris met Diane Brodie, the woman who became his wife - daughter of legendary San Francisco 49ers quarterback John Brodie - he had played on three teams in five years and his football future looked bleak. Just a few years later, Chris threw 3, 154 yards in one season, including 25 touchdown passes leading the Atlanta Falcans to a 14-2 regular season and on to the Super Bowl. When asked about his spectacular comeback, he told USA Today about his wife, Diane, and her father, John. He said they had a great relationship. John was loving and supportive while Diane was growing up, helping her develop a healthy dose of confidence and self esteem. She, in turn, did the same for her husband. By loving and supporting his efforts to improve, Diane helped Chris to become more confident and successful.
Howard W. Hunter said, "One of the greatest things a father can do for his children is to love their mother."
Fathers, if you want to help your children find happiness in marriage, give them a good example to follow. Take a moment to look at your young sons. Your treatment of their mother is teaching them how to treat the girls and women in their life, and eventually their wife. Now look at your young daughters. Do you want them to marry a man who treats them the way you treat their mother? If you are loving and supportive and affectionate with their mother, those are the characteristics your daughters will likely be drawn to when looking for a husband. If you are critical of your wife and too busy to give her the love and support she needs, that is what your daughters will grow up thinking is a normal, natural relationship between a husband and a wife and may very well choose the same kind of husband. And every bit as important as loving their mother, your daughters need to know you love them. Your love and support of her will give her the confidence she needs to choose a husband that also makes her feel loved and supported. Absent or distant fathers, or fathers who are critical and withhold loveing support from their daughters will likely have daughters who choose husbands just like their father. Why would they do that? Because deep inside these wounded daughters of God, they want to win their daddy's love. Without being aware of what they are doing, they keep putting themselves into relationships where they fight the same battle as they try to win the love of yet another distant and critical man. This often spills over into their perception of their Heavenly Father. If a woman grew up believing her father didn't love her and was critical of her, she may find it hard to believe that she is worthy of her Heavenly Father's love, and that His love is unconditional.
Fathers, when you understand the impact you have on your children, it might seem a bit overwhelming, but Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, provide you with a clear example of true fatherhood to follow. A father who emulates Their example will give each of his children the same unconditional love, sincere care and concern that Heavenly Father gives to him, not only when the children are young for lifelong; not only when the children are obedient, but even when they are disobedient, especially when they are disobedient. Unlike Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, you won't be perfect; you will make mistakes. But by daily communicating with Heavenly Father through prayer you will be guided in the right direction and begin to more fully understand what it means to be a true father.
In the Old Testament, King David showed true fatherhood in his unconditional love, care and concern for his son, Absolom. Absolom was David's third son and was described as the most handsome man in the kingdom. He wanted to be king and waged a rebellion in which he gained many followers. And even though he warred against his father, David told him men to deal gently with Absolom. One of his men, Joab, disobeyed and killed him. Upon hearing the news of his death, David grieved for his son. 2 Samuel 18:33 reads, "...the king was much moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept: and as he went, thus he said, O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God that I had died for thee, O Absalom, my son, my son!"
The exalted position of father was well stated by General Douglas MacArthur who said, "
By profession I am a soldier and take pride in that fact. But I'm prouder - infinitely prouder - to be a father. A soldier destroys in order to build; the (true) father only builds, never destroys. The one has the potential of death; the other embodies creation and life. And while the hordes of death are mighty, the battalions of life are mightier still. It is my hope that my (child), when I am gone, will remember me not from the battle but in the home repeating our simple daily prayer: Our Father who art in Heaven...."
May Heavenly Father richly bless you who are currently or will someday be fathers, or like Helaman, are surrogate fathers. May He bless you with wisdom, judgment, understanding, faith, kindness, and love. And may He bless the children in your life that your hand may strengthen and guide them safely home again. May those around you gain a deeper understanding of Heavenly Father because of your example of true fatherhood.
(Portions of this document are taken directly from the book, "What a Difference a Daddy Makes" by Dr. Kevin Leman.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
The Light of Christ
Some years ago, my daughter Hayley and I attended the birthday party of a friend held in a banquet hall some miles from home. Late in the evening when the party was over, the guests emerged from the hall to discover significant snow had fallen. The air was thick and appeared as a dense fog around us. As I secured four year old Hayley into her car-seat I worried about the long trip home. Deep ditches disguised by previously plowed snow, lined the back roads we would be traveling. The additional snowfall and low visibility would make the drive an even greater challenge.
Slowly, we inched our way along the road, toward home. Unfortunately, none of the other guests were from (my city) and turned the opposite direction from the banquet hall, leaving me to travel the road alone. Even as we slowly inched along, there were several times the car went into an uncontrollable slide but each time I was able to regain control and we continued on. Whether it was the act of sliding along the road, the lack of visibility, or the tension in my voice, Hayley became frightened and started to cry. To comfort her, I sang Primary songs and encouraged her to sing along. When she finally stopped her crying I asked her to say a prayer and ask Heavenly Father to help us get safely home. I don’t remember her words now, but I remember the comfort they brought to me and I felt we were in the Lord’s hands. It wasn’t long after her prayer that I noticed the faint headlights of another car in front of us. “The headlights cut narrow channels in the dense” snowy fog “pushing away the darkness”, as the light proved “stronger than the dark” . We were able to follow the headlights nearly all the way home and arrived safely.
During His earthly ministry the Savior proclaimed, “I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life” (John 8:12).
Later the Savior explained to Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery, “I am the light which shineth in darkness and the darkness comprehendeth it not”(D&C 6:21).
LDS author, Sherri Dew, stated “There are many kinds of darkness that can come into our lives. Loneliness, discouragement, and disappointment can cause us to feel a kind of darkness. Betrayal and pain can do likewise. When we make foolish mistakes or succumb to sin, we can expect to feel varying degrees of darkness, depending on our motive and intent as well as the light of knowledge we have enjoyed previously. But there is one source of Light that pushes away all darkness, as the Lord taught the Prophet Joseph through revelation: ‘That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.. And I say it that you may know the truth, that you may chase darkness from among you’ (D&C 50:24-25).”
The Light of Christ is greater than anything you have endured in the past which may weigh you down. His Light is greater than anything you are currently enduring, and His Light is greater than anything you may face in the future.
A young man watching the construction of a lighthouse said to his companion, “What difference will it make? The light will shine, the horn will blow, and yet the fog will still come”.
He is right, the fog will still come. The Lord in His wisdom does not shield anyone from trials, from grief and sadness. The purpose of His Light is to guide us safely through. The Lord has pledged – that if we come unto Him, have faith in Him, and seek after Him, He will push the darkness of mortality away from us with His power.
“If your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things” (D&C 88:67).
Spiritual light is generated from praying daily, studying the scriptures, from fasting, and serving, from living the gospel and obeying the commandments. D&C 115:5 says: "Arise and shine forth, that thy light may be a standard for the nations." The Lord said, “Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.”(Matt 5: 15-16)
We never know when the Light of Christ within us will serve as a guiding light to others. Regarding those who have been lost, the Savior said we “know not but what they will return and repent, and come unto me with full purpose of heart, and I shall heal them; and ye shall be the means of bringing salvation unto them.” (3 Nephi:18:32)
Isaiah, a great prophet of the Old Testament, said, “And it shall come to pass in the last days, that the mountain of the Lord’s house shall be established in the top of the mountains, … and all nations shall flow unto it.” (Isaiah 2:2)
President John Taylor referred to these nations saying, “They will come, saying, we do not know anything of the principles of your religion, but we perceive that you are an honest community; you administer justice and righteousness.”
With recent events, including Mitt Romney running for the office of president, and the defeat in California of proposition 8, we have seen a partial fulfillment of many prophecies. The nations of the earth and many of their leaders have come. They have witnessed church members as a whole, quickly and efficiently gathering resources, providing aid to those suffering the effects of various disasters. They have witnessed church members, individually, volunteering service in various communities. "They have seen the light in our eyes and felt the clasp of our hands."
“The mountain of the house of the Lord,” with its brightly lit spires, has been witnessed by nearly 4 billion people around the world. The nations have heard the glorious music performed by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints continues to be brought “forth out of obscurity and out of darkness.”
When Robert D. Hales spoke of the 2002 Winter Olympics held in Salt Lake City he said, “Throughout the Olympics there [were] many expressions of light, such as the Olympic flame; the child of light, and the theme, Light the Fire Within”. He went on to say that perhaps the most memorable light was found in the eyes of the competitors themselves. “But what was most moving was not the competition or the spectacle. It was the deeper truth these things symbolized – the source of Light within each of us.”
This Light which “inviteth and enticeth to do good continually” is “given to every man, that he may know good from evil.”
Only by being engaged in living the gospel of Jesus Christ, living it with all our heart, might, mind and strength can we generate enough spiritual light to push back the darkness. This world of darkness is never far away, in fact, it is always just around the corner waiting for an opportunity to come in. “If thou doest NOT well,” the Lord said, “sin lieth at the door” (Gen 4:7 emphasis added).
It is as predictable as any physical law: if we let the Light of Christ flicker or fade by failing to keep the commandments or by not partaking of the sacrament or praying or studying the scriptures, the darkness of the adversary will surely come in. “That wicked one cometh and taketh away light and truth, through disobedience.” (D&C 93:39)
In Job 12:25 we read of individuals who “grope in the dark without light” and “stagger like a drunken man.”
There is a way out of the “mists of darkness” and onto the path that leads to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come. The Lord told Isaiah, “I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them.” (Isaiah 42:16)
We made a covenant at baptism and we renew it every week when we partake of the sacrament - to take upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ, to always remember Him, and to keep His commandments. This covenant includes the promise that we will always have His Spirit, that we will always have that Light to be with us. The emblems of the Savior’s Atonement remind us that we need not stumble in darkness. We can have His Light with us always.
The Savior said, “I am come a light into the world.” (John 12:46). “He that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.” (John 8:12)
The Lord is our Light and He is literally our salvation. (Psalms 27:1) Like the sacred fire that encircled the children in 3 Nephi, (17:24) His Light will form a protective shield between you and the darkness of the adversary as you live worthy of it.
The apostle Paul declared, “The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light.” (Rom 13:12)
Jesus “is the light and the life of the world; the light that is endless, that can never be darkened.” (Mosiah 16:9)
In closing I’d like to quote Robert D. Hales. He said of Christ,
“He is the Light of Bethlehem, born of Mary, His mortal mother, and Almighty God, His Father.
He is the Light who was baptized by immersion, by John the Baptist, upon whom the Holy Ghost was manifest in the Spirit like a dove descending.
He is the Light in whom His Father was well pleased.
He is the Light at the head of the ancient Church, organized with Twelve Apostles, prophets, and seventies.
He is the Light of the Atonement fulfilled in the Garden of Gethsemane and on Golgotha, who took upon Himself the sins of the world, that all mankind may obtain eternal salvation.
He is the Light of the empty tomb, the resurrected Lord with a glorified body of flesh and bone, who broke the bands of death and gained an everlasting victory over the grave.
He is the Light that ascended into Heaven before the eyes of His disciples, with a promise that in like manner He would come again.
He is the Light that appeared with His Father and restored, through the Prophet Joseph Smith, the same Church He established during His ministry on earth.
He is the Light that leads and guides this Church today.”
"May we therefore recommit ourselves to radiate this Light of Christ. May we yoke ourselves to Him, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen."
(Much of this entry included quotes from Robert D. Hales or from Sherri Dew)
Slowly, we inched our way along the road, toward home. Unfortunately, none of the other guests were from (my city) and turned the opposite direction from the banquet hall, leaving me to travel the road alone. Even as we slowly inched along, there were several times the car went into an uncontrollable slide but each time I was able to regain control and we continued on. Whether it was the act of sliding along the road, the lack of visibility, or the tension in my voice, Hayley became frightened and started to cry. To comfort her, I sang Primary songs and encouraged her to sing along. When she finally stopped her crying I asked her to say a prayer and ask Heavenly Father to help us get safely home. I don’t remember her words now, but I remember the comfort they brought to me and I felt we were in the Lord’s hands. It wasn’t long after her prayer that I noticed the faint headlights of another car in front of us. “The headlights cut narrow channels in the dense” snowy fog “pushing away the darkness”, as the light proved “stronger than the dark” . We were able to follow the headlights nearly all the way home and arrived safely.
During His earthly ministry the Savior proclaimed, “I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life” (John 8:12).
Later the Savior explained to Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery, “I am the light which shineth in darkness and the darkness comprehendeth it not”(D&C 6:21).
LDS author, Sherri Dew, stated “There are many kinds of darkness that can come into our lives. Loneliness, discouragement, and disappointment can cause us to feel a kind of darkness. Betrayal and pain can do likewise. When we make foolish mistakes or succumb to sin, we can expect to feel varying degrees of darkness, depending on our motive and intent as well as the light of knowledge we have enjoyed previously. But there is one source of Light that pushes away all darkness, as the Lord taught the Prophet Joseph through revelation: ‘That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.. And I say it that you may know the truth, that you may chase darkness from among you’ (D&C 50:24-25).”
The Light of Christ is greater than anything you have endured in the past which may weigh you down. His Light is greater than anything you are currently enduring, and His Light is greater than anything you may face in the future.
A young man watching the construction of a lighthouse said to his companion, “What difference will it make? The light will shine, the horn will blow, and yet the fog will still come”.
He is right, the fog will still come. The Lord in His wisdom does not shield anyone from trials, from grief and sadness. The purpose of His Light is to guide us safely through. The Lord has pledged – that if we come unto Him, have faith in Him, and seek after Him, He will push the darkness of mortality away from us with His power.
“If your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things” (D&C 88:67).
Spiritual light is generated from praying daily, studying the scriptures, from fasting, and serving, from living the gospel and obeying the commandments. D&C 115:5 says: "Arise and shine forth, that thy light may be a standard for the nations." The Lord said, “Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.”(Matt 5: 15-16)
We never know when the Light of Christ within us will serve as a guiding light to others. Regarding those who have been lost, the Savior said we “know not but what they will return and repent, and come unto me with full purpose of heart, and I shall heal them; and ye shall be the means of bringing salvation unto them.” (3 Nephi:18:32)
Isaiah, a great prophet of the Old Testament, said, “And it shall come to pass in the last days, that the mountain of the Lord’s house shall be established in the top of the mountains, … and all nations shall flow unto it.” (Isaiah 2:2)
President John Taylor referred to these nations saying, “They will come, saying, we do not know anything of the principles of your religion, but we perceive that you are an honest community; you administer justice and righteousness.”
With recent events, including Mitt Romney running for the office of president, and the defeat in California of proposition 8, we have seen a partial fulfillment of many prophecies. The nations of the earth and many of their leaders have come. They have witnessed church members as a whole, quickly and efficiently gathering resources, providing aid to those suffering the effects of various disasters. They have witnessed church members, individually, volunteering service in various communities. "They have seen the light in our eyes and felt the clasp of our hands."
“The mountain of the house of the Lord,” with its brightly lit spires, has been witnessed by nearly 4 billion people around the world. The nations have heard the glorious music performed by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints continues to be brought “forth out of obscurity and out of darkness.”
When Robert D. Hales spoke of the 2002 Winter Olympics held in Salt Lake City he said, “Throughout the Olympics there [were] many expressions of light, such as the Olympic flame; the child of light, and the theme, Light the Fire Within”. He went on to say that perhaps the most memorable light was found in the eyes of the competitors themselves. “But what was most moving was not the competition or the spectacle. It was the deeper truth these things symbolized – the source of Light within each of us.”
This Light which “inviteth and enticeth to do good continually” is “given to every man, that he may know good from evil.”
Only by being engaged in living the gospel of Jesus Christ, living it with all our heart, might, mind and strength can we generate enough spiritual light to push back the darkness. This world of darkness is never far away, in fact, it is always just around the corner waiting for an opportunity to come in. “If thou doest NOT well,” the Lord said, “sin lieth at the door” (Gen 4:7 emphasis added).
It is as predictable as any physical law: if we let the Light of Christ flicker or fade by failing to keep the commandments or by not partaking of the sacrament or praying or studying the scriptures, the darkness of the adversary will surely come in. “That wicked one cometh and taketh away light and truth, through disobedience.” (D&C 93:39)
In Job 12:25 we read of individuals who “grope in the dark without light” and “stagger like a drunken man.”
There is a way out of the “mists of darkness” and onto the path that leads to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come. The Lord told Isaiah, “I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them.” (Isaiah 42:16)
We made a covenant at baptism and we renew it every week when we partake of the sacrament - to take upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ, to always remember Him, and to keep His commandments. This covenant includes the promise that we will always have His Spirit, that we will always have that Light to be with us. The emblems of the Savior’s Atonement remind us that we need not stumble in darkness. We can have His Light with us always.
The Savior said, “I am come a light into the world.” (John 12:46). “He that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.” (John 8:12)
The Lord is our Light and He is literally our salvation. (Psalms 27:1) Like the sacred fire that encircled the children in 3 Nephi, (17:24) His Light will form a protective shield between you and the darkness of the adversary as you live worthy of it.
The apostle Paul declared, “The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light.” (Rom 13:12)
Jesus “is the light and the life of the world; the light that is endless, that can never be darkened.” (Mosiah 16:9)
In closing I’d like to quote Robert D. Hales. He said of Christ,
“He is the Light of Bethlehem, born of Mary, His mortal mother, and Almighty God, His Father.
He is the Light who was baptized by immersion, by John the Baptist, upon whom the Holy Ghost was manifest in the Spirit like a dove descending.
He is the Light in whom His Father was well pleased.
He is the Light at the head of the ancient Church, organized with Twelve Apostles, prophets, and seventies.
He is the Light of the Atonement fulfilled in the Garden of Gethsemane and on Golgotha, who took upon Himself the sins of the world, that all mankind may obtain eternal salvation.
He is the Light of the empty tomb, the resurrected Lord with a glorified body of flesh and bone, who broke the bands of death and gained an everlasting victory over the grave.
He is the Light that ascended into Heaven before the eyes of His disciples, with a promise that in like manner He would come again.
He is the Light that appeared with His Father and restored, through the Prophet Joseph Smith, the same Church He established during His ministry on earth.
He is the Light that leads and guides this Church today.”
"May we therefore recommit ourselves to radiate this Light of Christ. May we yoke ourselves to Him, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen."
(Much of this entry included quotes from Robert D. Hales or from Sherri Dew)
Saturday, November 8, 2008
"If Ye Love Wealth Better Than Liberty"
Samuel Adams (Sep 27, 1722 - October 2, 1803) was an American revolutionary and organizer of the Boston Tea Party. He was governor of Massachusetts from 1793-1797.
"Contemplate the mangled bodies of your countrymen, and then say 'what should be the reward of such sacrifices?' bid us and our posterity bow the knee, supplicate the friendship and plough, and sow, and reap, to glut the avarice of the men who have let loose on us the dogs of war to riot in our blood and hunt us from the face of the earth? If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen!"
His words are equally appropriate today.
"Contemplate the mangled bodies of your countrymen, and then say 'what should be the reward of such sacrifices?' bid us and our posterity bow the knee, supplicate the friendship and plough, and sow, and reap, to glut the avarice of the men who have let loose on us the dogs of war to riot in our blood and hunt us from the face of the earth? If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen!"
His words are equally appropriate today.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving time is like no other time of the year. It is an invigorating time just before winter's chill. A time of expectation. It is the time when the glow of autumn turns to muted shades of brown, when the sky is gray with the promise of snow. We feel a child-like excitement about the impending holidays as the stores decorate their windows with Indian corn and pictures of pilgrims.
In my mind I picture the men and women who celebrated the first Thanksgiving. They had suffered greatly, enduring three and an half months of agony on the Atlantic Ocean in a leaky ship. Then they had to clear the land and build crude houses to protect them from the elements. The wilderness, winter, and disease seemed united against them. Less than a year later only half of them survived. In spite of this, or more likely because of this, they celebrated with their Indian friends by having a feast. They were thankful, not for their abundance or affluence, but for the sheer gratitude of being alive, and the opportunity to pursue life in this new land.
Some of these thankful people were my ancestors. Stephen and his wife Elizabeth Hopkins, William and Mary Brewster, managed to survive that first winter and were among those celebrating. This is a time to remember all our ancestors, whoever they might have been and whatever land they inhabited. We are linked to them still, a part of them remains in us.
I think sometimes our abundance of blessings can be a hindrance to real gratitude. We become so involved in enjoying the blessings that we neglect to give thanks to the Giver. When I make attempts to properly thank Him I hardly know where to begin. Though my home is humble it is ample for my needs and the needs of my young daughter. We have food to eat, we have clothing to wear, we are healthy and happy. We have blessings that many people of the world have never seen. Each day, when I get out of bed, I use dozens of seemingly ordinary blessings. Electricity at the flick of a switch, water at the turn of a faucet - hot and cold, a dry soft towel which I neither had to spin thread for, nor weave. A comb, a toothbrush, a bar of soap. The list continues to grow. Most people have a breakfast that would be a royal feast in the eyes of much of the world's population. And while millions crave only a place to lay their heads to sleep or forget their misery, I have a warm soft bed with clean sheets and blankets. Though my income labels me as lower middle class, I have many comforts.
With all these comforts, it is easy to be thankful. But what if all I had were suddenly taken away and I was left alone in the world, alone with only my faith in God to sustain me, alone with survival as my only blessing. Could I still give thanks? I think of that great man, Job. In one day Job was impoverished, all the basis of his wealth, oxen, sheep, camels, servants, and even his children were obliterated. The scriptures say that Job rent his mantle, shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground and worshipped. And then he said, "Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." His friends added to his grief by suggesting he must have sinned for such terrible things to have happened. Even his wife urged him to curse God and die. He heroically replied, "What, shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?" And the book of Job states that in all this he did not sin with his lips.
I believe there is a definite link between gratitude and spirituality. The blessings our Heavenly Father gives to us are gifts of His love, given with the hope that we will wisely use them. This Thanksgiving, take a moment to think of all that you have been blessed with and give geniune thanks to the One who bestows these blessings.
In my mind I picture the men and women who celebrated the first Thanksgiving. They had suffered greatly, enduring three and an half months of agony on the Atlantic Ocean in a leaky ship. Then they had to clear the land and build crude houses to protect them from the elements. The wilderness, winter, and disease seemed united against them. Less than a year later only half of them survived. In spite of this, or more likely because of this, they celebrated with their Indian friends by having a feast. They were thankful, not for their abundance or affluence, but for the sheer gratitude of being alive, and the opportunity to pursue life in this new land.
Some of these thankful people were my ancestors. Stephen and his wife Elizabeth Hopkins, William and Mary Brewster, managed to survive that first winter and were among those celebrating. This is a time to remember all our ancestors, whoever they might have been and whatever land they inhabited. We are linked to them still, a part of them remains in us.
I think sometimes our abundance of blessings can be a hindrance to real gratitude. We become so involved in enjoying the blessings that we neglect to give thanks to the Giver. When I make attempts to properly thank Him I hardly know where to begin. Though my home is humble it is ample for my needs and the needs of my young daughter. We have food to eat, we have clothing to wear, we are healthy and happy. We have blessings that many people of the world have never seen. Each day, when I get out of bed, I use dozens of seemingly ordinary blessings. Electricity at the flick of a switch, water at the turn of a faucet - hot and cold, a dry soft towel which I neither had to spin thread for, nor weave. A comb, a toothbrush, a bar of soap. The list continues to grow. Most people have a breakfast that would be a royal feast in the eyes of much of the world's population. And while millions crave only a place to lay their heads to sleep or forget their misery, I have a warm soft bed with clean sheets and blankets. Though my income labels me as lower middle class, I have many comforts.
With all these comforts, it is easy to be thankful. But what if all I had were suddenly taken away and I was left alone in the world, alone with only my faith in God to sustain me, alone with survival as my only blessing. Could I still give thanks? I think of that great man, Job. In one day Job was impoverished, all the basis of his wealth, oxen, sheep, camels, servants, and even his children were obliterated. The scriptures say that Job rent his mantle, shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground and worshipped. And then he said, "Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." His friends added to his grief by suggesting he must have sinned for such terrible things to have happened. Even his wife urged him to curse God and die. He heroically replied, "What, shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?" And the book of Job states that in all this he did not sin with his lips.
I believe there is a definite link between gratitude and spirituality. The blessings our Heavenly Father gives to us are gifts of His love, given with the hope that we will wisely use them. This Thanksgiving, take a moment to think of all that you have been blessed with and give geniune thanks to the One who bestows these blessings.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
The Value of Adversity
It is in moments of disappointment, heartache, and loneliness that we often make the decisions that forge our faith, mold our character, and fortify our convictions. How can we know if we are truly honest unless our honesty is put to the test? How can we know we are virtuous unless there are opportunities to choose a non-virtuous path that we then resist? How do we know we have the strength to bear up under challenges unless we have trials and adversity?
Many years ago, I made some poor decisions that put me in a precarious situation. I tried all I could do to remedy the problem but to no avail. Finally I turned to my father and brother who traveled a good distance to take me back home. By rescuing me, my father and brother had done something for me that I could not do for myself.
Each one of us travels our life-path and at times needs to be rescued - rescued from loneliness and heartache, from despair and disillusionment, from consequences of innocent mistakes, and from blatant sin. Our Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ have rescued us more times than we are aware. As my earthly father and brother came to my rescue, so our Heavenly Father and Brother do for us, what we cannot do for ourselves. Over 100 times in the scriptures, the Lord promises to be with us during our times of need.
"Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice and open the door I will come in to him, and I will sup with him and he with me." (Rev. 3:20)
If you have doubts, read the story of Elisha, a great prophet who lived during a time when Israel was at war with Syria. He performed many miracles and acted as a great speaker for the Lord. While preparing to go to war, Elisha's servant had seen the massive army of Syrian soldiers who surrounded the city by night. When he reported back to Elisha, Elisha told the servant not to be afraid, because "....they that be with us are more than they that be with them". And Elisha prayed to God to open the servants spiritual eyes and when He did, the servant saw "the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha". (2 Kings 6)
We too have the hosts of Heaven assisting us in our times of need. Though our natural eyes cannot see them, they are there. Hope is the anchor of the soul, it keeps us from drifting aimlessly. We are sons and daughters of our Father in Heaven. Great strength comes in remembering who we are.
Slavery has been a great tragedy throughout history, but the most terrible, far reaching aspect was in making the slaves forget their true identity. "The cruelest thing you can do to a human being is to make him forget that he or she is the son or daughter of a king." (Truman G. Madsen)
The closer we grow to our Heavenly Father, the more clear and complete our vision because of who we really are, who we have always been, and who we may become. If we do not have a clear sense of our identity and purpose, we are much more vulnerable to hopelessness and despair.
I know that the light of Jesus Christ is stronger than any kind of darkness we face here; that we each have a purpose; that understanding who we are and who we have always been is central to our mortal success and eternal progression. As difficult a challenge as mortality is, we are not alone in our struggles.
Many years ago, I made some poor decisions that put me in a precarious situation. I tried all I could do to remedy the problem but to no avail. Finally I turned to my father and brother who traveled a good distance to take me back home. By rescuing me, my father and brother had done something for me that I could not do for myself.
Each one of us travels our life-path and at times needs to be rescued - rescued from loneliness and heartache, from despair and disillusionment, from consequences of innocent mistakes, and from blatant sin. Our Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ have rescued us more times than we are aware. As my earthly father and brother came to my rescue, so our Heavenly Father and Brother do for us, what we cannot do for ourselves. Over 100 times in the scriptures, the Lord promises to be with us during our times of need.
"Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice and open the door I will come in to him, and I will sup with him and he with me." (Rev. 3:20)
If you have doubts, read the story of Elisha, a great prophet who lived during a time when Israel was at war with Syria. He performed many miracles and acted as a great speaker for the Lord. While preparing to go to war, Elisha's servant had seen the massive army of Syrian soldiers who surrounded the city by night. When he reported back to Elisha, Elisha told the servant not to be afraid, because "....they that be with us are more than they that be with them". And Elisha prayed to God to open the servants spiritual eyes and when He did, the servant saw "the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha". (2 Kings 6)
We too have the hosts of Heaven assisting us in our times of need. Though our natural eyes cannot see them, they are there. Hope is the anchor of the soul, it keeps us from drifting aimlessly. We are sons and daughters of our Father in Heaven. Great strength comes in remembering who we are.
Slavery has been a great tragedy throughout history, but the most terrible, far reaching aspect was in making the slaves forget their true identity. "The cruelest thing you can do to a human being is to make him forget that he or she is the son or daughter of a king." (Truman G. Madsen)
The closer we grow to our Heavenly Father, the more clear and complete our vision because of who we really are, who we have always been, and who we may become. If we do not have a clear sense of our identity and purpose, we are much more vulnerable to hopelessness and despair.
I know that the light of Jesus Christ is stronger than any kind of darkness we face here; that we each have a purpose; that understanding who we are and who we have always been is central to our mortal success and eternal progression. As difficult a challenge as mortality is, we are not alone in our struggles.
Monday, July 9, 2007
Transracial Adoption
Cultural genocide is defined as, "The deliberate destruction of the cultural heritage of a people or nation for political or military reasons." The National Association of Black Social Workers (NABSW) believe cultural genocide is being committed every time White parents are permitted to adopt a Black child. In the book "The Case For Transracial Adoption", Dr. Rita J. Simon cites the NABSW statement, "Transracial adoption is a massive conspiracy on the part of the White community to steal Black children." Is the intent to steal Black children or to fulfill a mutual need?
In 1948, fulfilling a mutual need was cited as the reason for the first recorded incidence of White parents adopting a Black child in the United States. Since that time, transracial adoptions rapidly increased until the early 1970's when the NABSW demanded that no Black child be placed in a White home for any reason. The group was successful in dramatically reducing the incidence of transracial adoptions, which in turn, severely overtaxed the existing foster care program and caused many Black children to remain in unsafe home environments for the lack of "acceptable" alternatives. P.B. a Black insurance executive from Philadelphia (who wishes to remain anonymous) stated she would rather see a child spend his or her entire childhood in foster care than to be raised by White parents. Despite such harsh criticism, comprehensive studies have proven Whites to be effective parents for Black children, with the children reaching adulthood well adjusted and culturally informed.
In order to raise a well adjusted Black child, White parents recognize the importance of making the child comfortable in his or her own skin. Because Black children will face challenges that other children will never experience, White parents have a special responsibility to nurture and strengthen their self image. As a White parent of a Black daughter, I cannot completely understand what it means to be Black. Like most White people, I do not focus on my skin color. It does not enter my mind during the day that I am White. The reason for this, is that my White skin is not part of my day-to-day experiences. Black people do not have the luxury of being complacent about skin color. I first became aware of this when I took my daughter to visit an acquaintance in Chattanooga, Tennessee. During the 600 mile drive, I stopped for lunch at a fast food restaurant in a small town off the interstate. My daughter was three months old, and as I carried her into the restaurant, people around me stopped talking, stopped eating, stopped whatever they were doing, and turned to stare at us. I was shocked as I looked into their White faces and saw hatred and anger. My plan had been to relax and eat at the restaurant, but fearing for our safety I took our food and quickly left. I had not realized the sight of a White mother and a Black baby could incite such negative emotion. I also had not realized that, even today, unlike White people, Black people cannot simply stop at any restaurant, off any stretch of highway, and eat wherever they choose. For their own safety, Black people have learned not to be complacent about their skin color.
Though my daughter cannot afford to be complacent about her skin color, I have taught her to appreciate the rich sepia color of her skin, her large black eyes, and her long black hair. I have also taught her to enjoy the diversity of our world, to love herself as a daughter of God, and to discover the many talents with which she has been blessed. Although I cannot always be with her to protect her from the ugly realities of prejudice, I help her to understand that race is only one aspect of who she is.
Though race is only one aspect of our identity, it plays an important role in developing a well adjusted Black child. It is important to a child's self esteem, that he or she have positive relationships with people who look like them. Jaiya John, a Black man who was one of the first to be adopted by White parents in the United States, grew up in Los Alamos, New Mexico where there were very few other Blacks. He recounted an experience in his book, "Black Baby White Hands" when he saw another Black child. He said, "Those rare times when I experienced a 'Black sighting', a strange mix of emotions ran through me. Excitement came on, like when you are in a place where no one speaks your language, and finally one person appears who can understand you." His experience illustrates how alien he felt having black skin when those around him did not. Today's White parents place a high priority on residing in diversely rich neighborhoods and enrolling their Black children in schools where they have a high percentage of Black classmates and teachers. This has greatly improved the well being of Black children and increased the success of transracial adoptions. In spite of the documented studies, there are still those who remain skeptical and who have made attempts over the years to ban transracial adoption.
Though the attempts to ban transracial adoption have been many, White parents achieved a legal triumph when, in 1996, Congress passed a law prohibiting "race, color, or national origin" from being factors in adoption run by any state, or state subsidized organization. Dr. Simon was one of those who testified before Congress in support of the new law. As a professor of public affairs at American University in Washington D.C. and the publisher of more than 50 books, Dr. Simon conducted extensive studies on the effects of transracial adoption during a 20 year period. She interviewed 206 transracial adoptive families and found overwhelmingly positive results. When compared to Black adoptive parents of Black children (inner-racial adoption), White adoptive parents were found to involve their Black children in far more cultural awareness activities. These activities included taking their Black children to Black history museums, reading and teaching the children about famous Black Americans, attending African dance, theater, and musical performances. In addition, Clark Doll Testing showed Black children adopted by White parents identified Black dolls as being, "smart", "pretty", "nice", and "most desired". The Clark Doll Test was designed by a Black couple, Kenneth and Maime Clark in the 1940's to validate the damaging effects of segregation. The test involved placing Black and White dolls on a table in front of a Black child and asking him or her to choose which doll was "smart", which doll was "pretty", which doll was "nice", and which one they most wanted to take home with them. When the test was conducted in the 1940's and 1950's, Black children nearly always chose the White dolls for all four responses. The contemporary test results performed for transracially adopted children indicated they were well adjusted and felt a healthy connection to their Black culture.
In light of the evidence that Black children are being successfully raised by White parents to be well adjusted and culturally informed, those who continue to oppose transracial adoptions need to examine their own biases and ask what are their true objections? Do they really believe it is more advantageous for a Black child to languish in foster care than to be raised by loving White parents? Dr. Simon ended her twenty year study with this comment, "...it would be wonderful to be able to report that policies have changed and that transracial adoptions have become accepted and widespread. Unfortunately, that latter has not happened, and there are no signs that the NABSW has softened or changed its stand on transracial adoption. Even as thousands of Black children continue to spend years in institutions and foster care, the NABSW continues to adhere to its 1971 position that institutionalization and foster care are better than transracial adoption. One can only continue to wonder - better for whom?"
My daughter and I are convinced that leaving her in foster care would not have been better for either one of us. Not long ago, while I was getting ready for work, she came in my room and asked, "What color is God?" I replied by asking, "What color do you think He is?" She thought for a moment and said, "Well, if we are created in His image, like the Bible says, His color must be a mixture of all our colors." Her answer assured me that I am on the right path in raising her to have a healthy view of diversity. Perhaps, with enough time, the controversy over transracial adoption will subside and it will be a widely accepted fact that White parents can successfully raise well-adjusted, culturally informed Black children. We can only hope.
In 1948, fulfilling a mutual need was cited as the reason for the first recorded incidence of White parents adopting a Black child in the United States. Since that time, transracial adoptions rapidly increased until the early 1970's when the NABSW demanded that no Black child be placed in a White home for any reason. The group was successful in dramatically reducing the incidence of transracial adoptions, which in turn, severely overtaxed the existing foster care program and caused many Black children to remain in unsafe home environments for the lack of "acceptable" alternatives. P.B. a Black insurance executive from Philadelphia (who wishes to remain anonymous) stated she would rather see a child spend his or her entire childhood in foster care than to be raised by White parents. Despite such harsh criticism, comprehensive studies have proven Whites to be effective parents for Black children, with the children reaching adulthood well adjusted and culturally informed.
In order to raise a well adjusted Black child, White parents recognize the importance of making the child comfortable in his or her own skin. Because Black children will face challenges that other children will never experience, White parents have a special responsibility to nurture and strengthen their self image. As a White parent of a Black daughter, I cannot completely understand what it means to be Black. Like most White people, I do not focus on my skin color. It does not enter my mind during the day that I am White. The reason for this, is that my White skin is not part of my day-to-day experiences. Black people do not have the luxury of being complacent about skin color. I first became aware of this when I took my daughter to visit an acquaintance in Chattanooga, Tennessee. During the 600 mile drive, I stopped for lunch at a fast food restaurant in a small town off the interstate. My daughter was three months old, and as I carried her into the restaurant, people around me stopped talking, stopped eating, stopped whatever they were doing, and turned to stare at us. I was shocked as I looked into their White faces and saw hatred and anger. My plan had been to relax and eat at the restaurant, but fearing for our safety I took our food and quickly left. I had not realized the sight of a White mother and a Black baby could incite such negative emotion. I also had not realized that, even today, unlike White people, Black people cannot simply stop at any restaurant, off any stretch of highway, and eat wherever they choose. For their own safety, Black people have learned not to be complacent about their skin color.
Though my daughter cannot afford to be complacent about her skin color, I have taught her to appreciate the rich sepia color of her skin, her large black eyes, and her long black hair. I have also taught her to enjoy the diversity of our world, to love herself as a daughter of God, and to discover the many talents with which she has been blessed. Although I cannot always be with her to protect her from the ugly realities of prejudice, I help her to understand that race is only one aspect of who she is.
Though race is only one aspect of our identity, it plays an important role in developing a well adjusted Black child. It is important to a child's self esteem, that he or she have positive relationships with people who look like them. Jaiya John, a Black man who was one of the first to be adopted by White parents in the United States, grew up in Los Alamos, New Mexico where there were very few other Blacks. He recounted an experience in his book, "Black Baby White Hands" when he saw another Black child. He said, "Those rare times when I experienced a 'Black sighting', a strange mix of emotions ran through me. Excitement came on, like when you are in a place where no one speaks your language, and finally one person appears who can understand you." His experience illustrates how alien he felt having black skin when those around him did not. Today's White parents place a high priority on residing in diversely rich neighborhoods and enrolling their Black children in schools where they have a high percentage of Black classmates and teachers. This has greatly improved the well being of Black children and increased the success of transracial adoptions. In spite of the documented studies, there are still those who remain skeptical and who have made attempts over the years to ban transracial adoption.
Though the attempts to ban transracial adoption have been many, White parents achieved a legal triumph when, in 1996, Congress passed a law prohibiting "race, color, or national origin" from being factors in adoption run by any state, or state subsidized organization. Dr. Simon was one of those who testified before Congress in support of the new law. As a professor of public affairs at American University in Washington D.C. and the publisher of more than 50 books, Dr. Simon conducted extensive studies on the effects of transracial adoption during a 20 year period. She interviewed 206 transracial adoptive families and found overwhelmingly positive results. When compared to Black adoptive parents of Black children (inner-racial adoption), White adoptive parents were found to involve their Black children in far more cultural awareness activities. These activities included taking their Black children to Black history museums, reading and teaching the children about famous Black Americans, attending African dance, theater, and musical performances. In addition, Clark Doll Testing showed Black children adopted by White parents identified Black dolls as being, "smart", "pretty", "nice", and "most desired". The Clark Doll Test was designed by a Black couple, Kenneth and Maime Clark in the 1940's to validate the damaging effects of segregation. The test involved placing Black and White dolls on a table in front of a Black child and asking him or her to choose which doll was "smart", which doll was "pretty", which doll was "nice", and which one they most wanted to take home with them. When the test was conducted in the 1940's and 1950's, Black children nearly always chose the White dolls for all four responses. The contemporary test results performed for transracially adopted children indicated they were well adjusted and felt a healthy connection to their Black culture.
In light of the evidence that Black children are being successfully raised by White parents to be well adjusted and culturally informed, those who continue to oppose transracial adoptions need to examine their own biases and ask what are their true objections? Do they really believe it is more advantageous for a Black child to languish in foster care than to be raised by loving White parents? Dr. Simon ended her twenty year study with this comment, "...it would be wonderful to be able to report that policies have changed and that transracial adoptions have become accepted and widespread. Unfortunately, that latter has not happened, and there are no signs that the NABSW has softened or changed its stand on transracial adoption. Even as thousands of Black children continue to spend years in institutions and foster care, the NABSW continues to adhere to its 1971 position that institutionalization and foster care are better than transracial adoption. One can only continue to wonder - better for whom?"
My daughter and I are convinced that leaving her in foster care would not have been better for either one of us. Not long ago, while I was getting ready for work, she came in my room and asked, "What color is God?" I replied by asking, "What color do you think He is?" She thought for a moment and said, "Well, if we are created in His image, like the Bible says, His color must be a mixture of all our colors." Her answer assured me that I am on the right path in raising her to have a healthy view of diversity. Perhaps, with enough time, the controversy over transracial adoption will subside and it will be a widely accepted fact that White parents can successfully raise well-adjusted, culturally informed Black children. We can only hope.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Happily Ever After
My Oldest Daughter, Aryn, Got Married
